Difficult afternoon

I'm finally starting to feel soemwhat better. The crushing depression is lifting, and I have a little more energy. However, Mother has been particularly frustrating today. She's asked the same questions -- mainly where's her mama and daddy and when is she going home and now, can she go to bed (at 5:45 in the evening) -- every few seconds. I am not exaggerating. It's wearing having to tell her that her mama and daddy have been dead for decades and not know if she's going to be upset this time or notm then have to answer the same question seconds later. I really do mean seconds, hardly enough time to get back to my desk.

It's fortunate that she knows who she is and can remember family, even if not in the current time and place. Things could be far worse. But some days it doesn't feel like it.

To top it off, I found my dream job. At this point, though, being able to work an on-site job is impossible. Sometimes, at-home work isn't possible either.

I feel like shit. I have for awhile now.

24 hours later. A new day. Feel a little better than yesterday. I got up before 1 p.m. as if it matters, but still...

I'm depressed. I'm angry. I'm restless. I feel isolated. I feel trapped. I feel like a real shit for feeling any of this. Writing it down makes nothing better; it just sounds whiny. It's not near as bad as it feels; so why I'm whining about it?

Censorship is UnAmerican

Silencing the media.  Barring citizens from criticizing the government.  Such is addressed specifically in the First Amendment -- the FIRST Amendment.  Numero Uno.  Wouldn't that make it more important than even the sacrosanct Second Amendment?  Ya think?

I've enjoyed reading many of the blogs over at Patheos Pagan over the years, but this cannot be allowed to go unnoticed.  Linked is John Halstead's recent article at The Allergic Pagan.  It's hosted at the moment on Gods & Radicals because Patheos Pagan has removed it.

https://godsandradicals.org/2017/01/31/repost-read-this-before-patheos-deletes-it/

They delivered my sister's ashes to me today.  Except for the seemingly endless bureaucracy surrounding it, her death hasn't been real to me.  I didn't see her every day or even talk to her on the phone or online up until the last few weeks.  But I knew where she was.  I guess I still know exactly where she is -- in my back room, waiting for Spring to come.

It's really an ugly little white box.  I think I'm going to plaster it with glittery butterfly stickers.

She did not simply like to read. She read voraciously, fiercely, carnivorously. She would lie in wait and pounce on unsuspecting books. She would rend and tear the paper-flesh of fiction and nonfiction alike, leaving barely a binding or a smear of ink, then lie down in the shade, sated. -- 5/28/2012

Apologies

My apologies for not updating my scheduled pages this week.  My sister's health has taken center stage lately and my blog has been an after-thought while I focus on her.  I will be back in full force over the next few days and especially on Sunday with Druid Works.  So tonight, I'll leave you with one thought -- a saying my sister is fond of.

Be excellent to each other, my friends.

Getting back on track and setting a schedule

Hello, all.  It's been a little while.  I'm getting back on track here and will be writing more frequently.  :)

I'm setting up a loose schedule for categorical postings, such as Druid/Dedicant work, Opinions/Rants, Favorite Authors/Books.  Thursdays, I think, will be my Favorite Authors posts -- so you can pick up something new to read for the weekend.  I have many friends that are authors, and I want to highlight their work.

So, keep watching and reading this space and tell your friends.

Brenda